This is a story about Wong’s first Thanksgiving, about how he ate so much turkey to celebrate the beginning of the holidays:

Wong was really hungry so he made a shopping list that included chopsticks and two horses to eat (dogs were too small), a gallon of gravy, 20 pounds of potatoes, a cartload of yam, 3 heads of lettuce, a pound of water chestnuts, a gallon of ranch dressing, a bottle of imported Chinese grease(the only thing Chinese about his food and his family), and a large loaf of All-American white bread, and of course, no Thanksgiving dinner could be complete without shrimp fried rice.

Wong started to drool at the thought of a 35 pound turkey and just had to add it to his list along with: a pound of refined Mexican rice, a bushel of fried pinto beans, 10 Medium pizzas from Little Ceasars, a White Castle Crave Case, and cookies, loads and loads of cookies. Cookies reminded him of chips and he decided to get the 11486728 chip bag and a pound and a half of yogurt. And to top it all off, he added 47 pounds of Jello to his list. With that said and done Wong set out with his list and began to eat. He became fatter and fatter(but not by much because he was fat to start off). He became so fat he was #3 in the class! His fatness began to spread, first throughout his body as his brain was crammed with fat, of course this was only a dream of Wong’s because he had not yet gone shopping for food to eat.

He exclaimed “Sweet mother of Jesus Nazi God!”, and immediately set out for the nearest supermarket, he got there and raided the store free of everything except two pieces of lent and a can of tomatoes. His bill came to 600,000,000 pieces of whale that he would later make into anal lube. He had to pay for the food he bought first, and of course he couldn’t, so he decided to eat the security personnel at the supermarket, then took his food and put it in the ho’s Taurus. Now, Wong said “It’s time for some CBS!” By CBS he meant crazy butt scrunching because he has grown so heavy, he scrunches his own butt! After eating so much, Wong had to sit down, he caused a huge shockwave throughout the country side, where all people died except Darren. The two nemesis faced off in the sumo match of the century. They shook their fat and stomped their feet until only one survived, and the one who had won was a big, fat, swollen man who ruled the world with an iron fist.

However, one day a little man came up to the winner, Wong, and asked him what the square root of 99 was, Wong checked his calculator and found the answer to be undefined, and Wong went Nooo!!!! And his head exploded.

Thus, Wong ruined his first ever Thanksgiving, and everyone learned a valuable lesson.